on the freeway…

Hello everyone,

Today is my Brother Phil’s Birthday. I thought he’d get a kick out of this story.

Last night when I was driving home from Culver City, I had turned on the radio to get a traffic report. Well, that and the Coast to Coast line up for the night.

Usually the 10 freeway going toward downtown is pretty clear;l until I get to downtown. It’s a real bottle neck there. Navigating L.A. traffic kinda requires a Forest Gump approach. You never know what you’re gonna get and need to take it as it comes. What you can count on, is somewhere there being ’slow and go’, or a ’sig alert’. Sig alerts mean there’s a wreck and traffic is backed up heavily.

About 10:30 PM, I was revving the VW in 3rd gear to a whopiping 63mph. I lost track of my gear shifting because I was trying to figure out why Pat Boone was the guest on Coast to Coast.

Then it came time for the traffic report.

And as always, there was a crash. Apparently, there was an overturned box truck. That’s kinda normal I’m figuring out. What was different this time was traffic backed up because the box truck had dumped it’s contents all over the Freeway.

At first I thought “what’s a box truck?” then the announcer said,

“That’s right folks an overturned box truck dumped Frozen Pigs all over the freeway!”

I’m contemplating; “I guess they call it a box truck cause it’s easier to say than refrigerator.”


I began to laugh at this just because I was glad to be far away from the frozen pigs. Think of all the car body damage that would do!

Then I felt bad for laughing thinking of all the fellow motorists on that freeway. I envisioned lots of swerving, honking and expletives. All trying to dodge frozen pigs while going 80 miles an hour.

When Phil and I were kids we watched a lot of “WKRP in Cincinatti.”

Although a very different scenario, it had that WKRP vibe. Remember when Arthur Carlson threw Turkey’s out of a helicopter at a Cincinatti Grocery store as a Thanksgiving promotion? Needless to say it was a disaster.

Very close to “God in the machine.” At least from the perspective of innocent people being pummeled by Pigs or Turkey’s.

“…as God as my witness I thought turkey’s could fly.”

-Arthur Calrson

Thanks for checking in.

Stephen A. Thomas

7 Responses to “on the freeway…”

  1. Larry Says:

    Phil sees a train.
    Phil sees a train.
    Phil wears a hat.
    Phil puts on shoes.

  2. Sathomas Says:

    Those lyrics would make a great kid’s song!

    I actually listened to it 3 times today.

    I see you got third verse down.

    Now that all the birthday songs are done I started another song called

    “Ah boogie doot doot doot.”


  3. Philip Thomas Says:

    I remember that episode. With Les Nesman describing the event on the radio like it was the Hindenburg disaster with people running for thier lives dodging falling Turkeys.

    The Pig Truck accident must have been bad because it made our news too. The headline read “Truck dumps frozen pigs on Highway”. Trying to figure out what kind of sicko would dump frozen pigs on the road I read on until I found it was just an accident and not intentional.

    Thanks for the B’day mem.


  4. sathomas Says:


    Les Nessman did that whole Hindenburg thing!

    Man, they really need to show that for thanksgiving.

    I’m laughing already.

    Maybe Dan can find it on Youtube. He’s great at that stuff.

    Hope you had great Birthday Phil.


  5. dan Says:

    Wow…i hardly remember that episode, but laughed all the way through the clip.

    Youtube will be the death of me yet…it’s still better than real tv, though.

  6. sathomas Says:

    Dan, You are so absolutely right my friend.

    I was praising all technology and geekdom for youtube lastnight when

    I found the clip.

    Keep sending me the cool clips for our edification here my freind.


  7. dan Says:

    ok, now youtube has given me the will to keep on living…at least until July of next year.


    I am so happy!!

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